Regarding number 2, you can change your primary email address on your user to a company email which will be used in the email router. So basically you're not forced to use the onmicrosoft.com email (though that will remain your login).
Regarding number 1, you will need to use the CRM 2011 email router with CRM 2011. This also means you will need another server/computer to host it on, as the CRM 4 and 2011 routers cannot run side-by-side.
However if you don't want to use the email router you could look at just using outlook to send/receive emails and ensure automatic tracking/sending rules.
Hope that helps
Paul
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